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Filed Under Business

A Boxing Day Retail Boycott

Posted November 25, 2008

Focus on the Family has the right idea in pointing out that we all need to know which retailers are supportive of Christmas. I too, believe we should systematically target those retailers who are amiss in celebrating Boxing Day.

There are two big reasons that this strategy is the Right Way. 1 – there is no better way to embody the Christmas spirit than to divide people up into different camps based on their ideas and practices. 2 – Focus on the Family knows that Christmas is about nothing if not crass commercialism. There is no separation between Church and Sale. So why not celebrate that by admitting that all those "happy holiday"-wishing chumps just don't want to make the big bucks from Black Friday til Christmas Eve?

Boxing Day is on the holiday calendar. Not once every four years, but each and every year. And people neglect it? Why is that? What exactly are you doing on December 26th, besides returning ugly sweaters to those previously-approved retailers who wished your gift giver a solid "Merry C" when they bought it?

Since I’m not a pugilist, and hey, I don’t even like boxing, but I do love boxes. I don't normally celebrate Boxing Day myself, but I believe more people should. It’s an international holiday, and if Americans can't recognize the importance of celebrating this important holiday, they should be kicked off the commercial rosters. If for no other reason, we as Americans need a day identified as the point at which we return all the ugly sweaters. Calling it Boxing Day sounds a little sweater. Sweeter. If these retailers just say “Merry Christmas” as a catchall phrase to represent any other winter holidays going along, hoping you'll know that they know it’s Boxing Day, it’s time for a little boycott.

Here’s how to boycott these retailers: announce your joyful "Good Boxing!" If they fail to acknowledge you, punch them in the face. If they continue to fail by responding to the traditional Boxing Day greeting by returning your punch in the face, write a sternly worded letter to the editor of your local newspaper and implore the citizens of your jurisdiction to boycott said retailer for their refusal to acknowledge this most punchy of winter holidays.



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